belly appreciation project

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Day 8: Bellies Are Good For …

… holding books and electronic devices and crystal balls and dinner plates and, well, basically anything you’d put on a lap desk. It IS literally a lap desk. 

I forget whether the rules of this game state that the belly has to actually be naked. There are plenty of ways for it to look weird in clothes. So I’ll probably do some that aren’t naked at some point. But for now, both, just so I don’t get in trouble. (Though who would ref me out, I wonder…)

This is my belly — slouching, sticking way out — waiting for an oil change. 

  

Bellies are good for...

It’s in!

  

Oops! it got out!

  

Day 7: Belly Over the Line
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Day 7: Belly Over the Line

A baby mouse, left behind at the old workplace.

The other day at work one of my colleagues made a slightly dirty joke, and I replied in a way that made it, well, a medium dirty joke. Then when someone else made a shocked face and said I took it over the line, I told her she had a point. That is what I do, for better or for worse.

In fact I’d been thinking about this not long before. It’s true. Another friend said of me a while back that I take jokes one step past where you think they’ll go. I’m not saying there’s anything particularly good or bad about this — just that it is a true reflection of my sense of humor, and of art and life in general, I suppose. I know everything has been done before, but I do tend to look for ways to put myself into the conversation that I feel are less represented.

Part of my motivation with any creative or public endeavor is to do some things that other people might be embarrassed to do — in the hopes that maybe someone will think, “I see that person doing the thing my heart is telling me to do, so maybe it’s ok for me to do it too.” I guess this blog series falls into that category.

Well, here is today’s picture: the belly that I know and love, that I look at every day, as it looks in the mirror.

Thanks for giving me the space to share all this, by the way. I appreciate it. It’s very helpful to me. And if this is helpful to anyone else in any way, I’ll be delighted. Thank you!

The full belly Monty.

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Day 6: Belly to the Altar of Song

At choir practice last night, for our check in, we had to share something along the lines of — Why do you come here? What’s the big draw?

I said something along the lines of — gospel singing, for me, is like this fully embodied worship experience that floods my heart with light until it overflows all over the freaking place. It’s the kind of worship that makes me feel like this is what I came to this planet to do.

I have been really struck ever since I joined this choir by just how embodied my singing is when I’m there. Sometimes I just get focused on my inner experience and feel my body moving to cradle my heart like a baby. Other times I’m upward focused, and my hands rise up like they’re made of helium without my consciously lifting them. And other times I’m calling out to the people there with me, stretching out to connect, leaning forward, feeling the ground beneath me and the air around me that are touching everyone simultaneously.

I feel really free to move with my singing and with my praise at Mosaic rehearsals and performances. I feel fully present and like I am growing into my truest self.

I notice these things because they’re not the norm. It stands out to me when I can take up all the space I take up and not be embarrassed. It’s not usual for me to feel like being the largest-bodied person there and fully being in my body is a place of great empowerment. It’s strange to me that I can stretch my limbs and not be concerned about who sees my naked belly.

Strange but good.

These are healing experiences for me. Musical opportunities often go hand in hand with mainstream ideas of prettiness (or sexiness), and having the body I have probably made me give up on a lot of things that I felt shut out of. Of course there

are some people who are visible exceptions to this trend, and I love them: Toshi Reagon, Israel Kamakawiwo’ole … Sometimes I imagine myself a little like them, only me. Sometimes I think of them when I’m at Mosaic.

So thanks, Mosaic, for existing! Thank you Spirit for guiding me there! I sure do feel lucky and grateful and blessed!

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Day 5: Om Belly Om

People always talk about the “Buddha belly,” but you know who really rocks a big belly? Sri Ganesha.

Yes, Ganesh’s belly is amazing. Ganesh is amazing! He is definitely a sensual fat guy. He loves the pleasures of the Earth, but his lack of attachment makes him light enough to dance on one toe on the back of a mouse.

I think that’s a role model worth having.

Ganesha & me

The other day I had the great pleasure of getting together with my friend Jyoti for wonderful conversation and a jam session. The last song we played together was a Ganesh chant. It was one I used to play all the time when I led kirtan in the mountains but have not done for a long time. We were nice and warmed up by that time, and we really got swinging on it. I had the strong feeling that some obstacles were really being removed as we sang (that’s one of the blessings this deity offers). Whew! Take ’em away, O Ganesha! Please and thank you!!!

This is is a different melody, but the same mantra, and the video has some awesome pictures of Sri Ganesha:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vk5fHyEQJr0

Happy chanting!

 

 

 

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Day 4: Big Bellies Go Places, Too

This belly was born and raised in the country and always seems to find its way back there. I work at a place outside Niwot, which is a small town outside Boulder, Colorado. One of the best things about that location is the long driveway, really practically a private one-lane road, that I can take a walk down when I get a break. It’s just … It gives me those feelings like, “take note of this moment, because it’s really damn awesome, and I feel really happy right now.”



In the sun



I was having more of those feelings tonight, when I went to McIntosh Lake in Longmont for the first time. OMG! Where has this place been all my life? I almost titled this post “BEST LAKE WALK IN COLORADO!” Even all caps doesn’t fully express my excitement at finding this lake. I’ve had a thing for “the lake walk” (which basically just consists of walking around lakes) since I lived in Minnesota, and this one seriously came close to filling the Lake Calhoun-shaped hole in my heart. At one point the lake and the spring air smelled so good I thought I might cry. 



McIntosh Lake



So, that’s what we get up to, belly and me.